I'm feeling a little weird lately. I haven't said more than a couple words to my horses this week. I've been spring cleaning. I've been working. I've been worn out at the end of the day.
I feel like I'm in a state of potentiality. Like when the stream is caught in an eddy, whirling, gaining energy, but not going anywhere... yet. And I don't feel like I can (or want to) shape the direction I'm heading. Yet. I feel like I'm waiting, whirling, energizing, and the waiting is difficult. Normally I can wait calmly. Or maybe I'm not normally waiting, maybe I'm normally sitting stagnant. Right now I really wish I could direct this energy somewhere, but I don't know where it's going yet. I know that wherever I'm headed is right. I just have to wait, and make ready to flow back out into the river again, then start paddling.
Maybe I'm crazy. (I bet I sound crazy.) Maybe it's springtime in my bones, wanting to burst forth. Maybe it's this supplement I'm on. Maybe I'm getting healthier? Maybe I ate too much salad today. Who knows.
I'm not discounting the possibility that nothing huge is going to change in my life. That maybe all this means is that my house will be cleaner. But that's a change for the positive, and bigger than it sounds. I'll take it. :)
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ReplyDeleteA little break from the horses isn't always a bad thing, I take them all the time. It usually means there isn't anything meaningful to do right now. I've been gearing up again with the TTouch, as you've read, but I have pressing need for it in my barn. Did you decide to keep Scout? I was talking with a friend at coffee the other day who had seen him for sale and she likes him a lot.
ReplyDeleteWell I don't think you sound crazy and I hope your direction comes clearer soon.
ReplyDeleteLinda, if it were up to me I might sell him. He's not my heart horse, even though he is pretty awesome. But John just said, "Not gonna happen." So I guess it's not up to me. :D
ReplyDeleteI was talking to my sister today and I guess there are a lot of people having a sudden shift of energy and inspiring spiritual experiences. I thought maybe it was a spring thing but apparently this is more than usual. Interesting...
Well, that's interesting. I've felt more energetic, too, but I started Weight Watchers and have been eating a lot more fruits and vegetables...plus the traveling, which is always inspiring since it gets you out of the ruts. The TTouch is kind of spiritual, too. Weird.
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